A Fool Proof Plan

In this 2010 the year of our lord, gaming as a hobby is pretty expensive. With three consoles offering a huge variety of A-list games, not to mention handhelds and PC it's very easy to spend more than you planned. It is also a huge kick in the balls to spend a full $70 on a game only to see it drops down to half that in a matter of weeks. That's why Jaison and I came up with a plan that is genius in it's simplicity.

Stop buying games for a couple of months. For some people that's an easy task. Millions of people manage to not buy games every day! But when you are big smelly nerds like us buying games is as vital as buying food, or suspenders, or star wars figures. But hear me out! Take a month or two to clear out the backlog and beat some games you never got around to. Then, by the time you're done that, the ones that just came out will hopefully have dropped in price a bit (Or a lot in some cases).

Then when you are done with THOSE games, in theory the next new releases will have come down in price. By creating this time bubble and gaming in the past, you will enjoy every game as much and hopefully save some money! I'd like to thank the Amish for coming up with this idea.

There is also the added side effect that you might end up skipping a few games that probably weren't worth your money anyway. I own a few games that I bought on launch day because of glowing early reviews and kick ass trailers, only to find that they are shit from a butt. Fuel and Dragon rising I am looking at you!

Games I Like - God Hand

To keep this from becoming one big whiney bitch fest, I figure every so often I'll pick a game that I really like then get down on my knees and give it a big sloppy recommendation. First up, GOD HAND.

"What's so great about this game?" I hear you asking. As a wise man once said, "It's just a game about punching people." The beauty is in the simplicity my friends. At it's core God Hand is a modern take on old school arcade beat 'em ups. Enemies come at you from all angles and you beat the living shit out of them with an array of over the top combos and finishing moves.

The action is moved along by truly awful B-movie cutscenes and some hilariously corny dialog. It's so over the top in every way that if you're the kind of person who doesn't get their undies in a bunch over everything not being perfectly logical in a VIDEO GAME, you're bound to get some good laughs out of the sheer insanity of it all.

The story certainly adds to the charm, but the gameplay here is definitely the star of the show. Over the course of the game you earn money to purchase and unlock new basic moves which you can combine to create some awesome custom combos. You also unlock God Reel techniques which are super flashy special attacks that range from booting someone in the nards to punching them into outer space.

The combat is super technical and unforgiving at times. If you button mash the game is going to shit all over you in short order. At the same time it doesn't rely on super cheap enemies, so you are able to take on most foes with a little practice. There is also no blocking in the game. Instead, your right analogue stick controls the direction you dodge. It's a neat feature and requires more technique than just holding the block button.

In short, this game expects a lot from the player and while it's not for pussies it holds great rewards for those who are able to master it. Plus it's got chihuaha races, wrestling gorillas, a big fat hispanic guy named Elvis, gambling, evil three stooges, power ranger midgets, and so much more. To prove it's real and not just a wonderful dream, check the trailer!

Modern Warfare 2 vs Bad Company 2

Right now when it comes to tactical shooters, there are two big names everyone has probably heard of: Modern warfare and Battlefield. To anyone who doesn't play many games they probably look pretty similar. Even to somebody like myself who's played just about every shooter under the sun, you'd be hard pressed to tell them apart in some regards. After beating the singleplayer campaign and clocking a truly disgusting amount of hours in the multiplayer portions of both, I thought I'd weigh in on their pros and cons.

Which will come out on top? Who can charlie the most oscar mikes to delta? More importantly, who gives a shit? Read on to find out!


Campaign

I have to admit that I was shocked by the similarities in the overall plots of both games. Russians invading the US? EMP devices? Betrayal for little to no reason? Come on guys Tom Clancy could have eaten a bowl of alphabits and shit out a better story than this. Overall I was disappointed by both, though battlefield wins this round by a small margin. The story is the least bit coherent, which is more than you could say for MW 2. Some of the humor that made the first Bad Company unique is present, but dialed back to make room for more Bro-ments and nonsensical military jargon.

All that aside, what hurts these games the most is the pacing. You barely get done running from one killbox to the next before you're whisked away to the next exotic locale. When you're constantly being bombarded with setpieces and crazy shit it starts to lose it's appeal. What makes a roller coaster so intense? It's the feeling you get being winched to the top of that first huge drop. Like a good roller coaster, pacing needs to rise and fall to keep players on their toes.


Gameplay

Much more similar this time around. The combat in MW 2 feels a little more tactile and arcade-y while the explosions, smoke and debris give BC 2 a more visceral feel. The controls in BC 2 are vastly improved over the first and bear much more resemblance to MW 2. Partially because of the sound (especially when audio is set to War Tapes), the guns in BC 2 pack much more of a wallop.

Sadly both seem to have failed where their predecessors succeeded when it comes to gameplay variety. MW 2 tries to mix it up a bit with snowmobiles, boats and a few other additions. None of them are anywhere near as exciting as the AC 130 or sniping mission in MW 1. Bad Company 2 also loses a great deal of it's vehicle sections, which helped the first feel a little more unique.

The destructible environments in BC 2 are great fun and add a lot to the intensity of the firefights. Sadly the destruction doesn't come into play all that often. You rarely have to demolish anything to succeed. I would have liked to see them find more creative uses for it. Overall it's a tie between the 2 as they offer slightly different twists on the same core shooter mechanics.

Next round: Multiplayer!